Hopeful Romantic

Currently writing this as I wait for my car to have its oil changed and tires rotated. The wifi here is not the best, but I shall make do. Really glad I had the foresight to bring my laptop and journal so I can crank out today's entry because this is going to take at least an hour if not longer. (Way to go Tires Plus, great job on efficiency). I joke though, the guy who checked me in was really nice and was able to check to make sure they had the oil in stock that went with the coupon I had, so way to go, Andrew,* you get the gold star in customer service.

Today has been a really great day so far after my car is done I have QPower to go to and then need to get some groceries and incidentals. I also hope to get some pages of the short story that I'm working on cranked out.

Looks like today's journal entry is a long one, at least three pages long. Let's get to it.


Sunday, June 7, 2009

I finally cut my nails, and I'm not going to lie, it looks weird to me. I really wish that I didn't have to work today. I realized that I told Mrs. C that I'd stop in on Thursday but I can't because I have Orientation, I need to look at my papers to see where I'm supposed to go. 

The Minnesota trip was downright amazing and it really made me think about moving to St. Paul. Man, I'm so proud to have been born there, I just wish I could have spent some time growing up there too. 

I hope Lindsey's* present fits her, I got her a 'Flight of the Concords' T-shirt thanks to Bethany's* help for finding it. 

I'm going to watch 'Phantom' and paint my toes bright sparkly blue!

So I was mistaken in thinking that Orientation was this week, it's next week so I can visit Mrs. C on Thursday. Yay. Wow, I really love 'Phantom of the Opera' and I love coffee and that it's picking me up so I don't feel so dead. I think that I might just survive work tonight. I really hope May* is working GSTL tonight because she is super laid back and awesome. 

I'm recognizing the signs of a lonely heart and hopeless love and I want to put them to an end before anything happens! I'm starting to think that I'm a hopeless romantic. I mean I read romance novels in hopes that someday I may be one of the heroines and deep in my heart of hearts, I really enjoy romantic comedies. -sigh- I know though that I'm in no shape (pun accidentally intended) for any romantic relationship. I hope that something does find me though, I hope that someone fabulous comes into my life this summer, I really hope. 

Lisa* just called, we're going to hang out on Tuesday after her orientation. She told me that she's dating Trevor* now. I'm glad that everything worked out for her and Trevor and that the whole Kris* thing is over. I'm also happy that she called, I'm glad that people are calling me at home and taking the summer sans cell seriously. Ugh, now I need to get ready for work, I hope it goes by fast!

Work was so friggin' SLOW! I'm so glad that it's over! I'm watching "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days" even though the Tonys are on, I don't feel like watching it with it being more than half done. 

Oh my god, if I EVER turn out to be one of the girls in this movie I think I might shoot myself! Evan* was working today, he's cute. If he wanted to hang out after work I'd be game. 

Oh my God, I really love this movie. Kate Hudson is amazing! She's SO FUNNY! Oh my Jesus, I'd LOVE to try this sometime. Hahaha oh and let me add that Matthew McConaughey is a BABE! Oh man, I'm so jealous of everyone in a really amazing relationship right now. Oh Goddess of love, please work your magic so that I can experience a truly amazing relationship.

"Tone deaf and drunk is never a good combination" - How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

*Names have been changed


Lots to reflect on in this post. So in case it hasn't been mentioned, in 2009 I auditioned for and got accepted into the BFA Acting program at US-Stevens Point. I believe the orientation I was referring to was the general Freshman orientation at UW, and not the Theater Program one, that one usually happened in August and then there was a 'Dis-orientation' to follow.

Ironically "Lisa" and "Trevor" only dated for a few months. Lisa ended up dating some women after that, and many years down the road Trevor would marry one of my sorority sisters and have a kid. Life is funny how it works, isn't it?

Not sure if I would consider myself a hopeless romantic even today, but after Googling the definition maybe I am. I believe that everyone is inherently good and that tomorrow is a new day and things will always work out.  It won't do you ANY good to dwell on the negative and surround yourself with pessimistic assholes,...if you're doing this please do yourself a favor and stop. Surround yourself with people who find the good in everything, people who radiate positive healing energy. Find those people, and make them your people. Your soul will thank you.

As I reflect on life and love I think that perhaps the term hopeless romantic is flawed. I'm not hopeless, I'm hopeful, thus I must be a Hopeful Romantic. I have hope in love and in the good that lies in everyone. I have hope that I will find love again and hope to find the ability to love myself unconditionally. I doubt I would have made it this far in my life if I had a hopeless attitude about everything. Even when I went through messy breakups, leaving my job unexpectedly, and started this journey of self-discovery, I always remained hopeful about the lessons that I have learned and for the next chapter in my life.

When it comes to love and romance though, I am on a hiatus. I'm not currently seeking anyone or anything out and my dating profiles are quietly collecting dust somewhere in the dark vastness of the internet. And that is just perfectly fine by me. I usually like to have my life more or less in order before I decide to add a romantic relationship into the equation. I never took calculus and men are complicated enough as is.

...Am I becoming like Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City? Is that what this blog will become? I did really love the series, so maybe that won't be the worst thing in the world. Who would be my Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha? Should I start an open casting call? Ha, what a thought to have.

Well, I think that I've rambled enough on this entry, if you've been reading my blogs so far, thank you. Not sure how I'm liking this format on Blogger, may want to explore other options but so far this interface seems to be the easiest to use. If you readers have any feedback please let me know. It'd be nice to know what you think.

Until next time, feel the sunshine on your face and smile.

- JG