Monday, May 28, 2018
Happy Memorial Day everyone!
I've had to work the entire weekend and feel such a deep resentment for retail that I'm pulling my hair out and gnashing my teeth because I want to die! That being said, I've looked through all the journals that I've had and I literally did not write jack-shit in May for whatever reason through all the years that I've been journaling. Thankfully I am rectifying that in my current journal, but that is neither here nor there. So to make up for the fact that I have no past entries to reflect on, and I have a burning hatred for corporate America within my heart, why not reflect on some angsty dark poetry I wrote when I was 14. Hell yeah! Let's add fuel to this mother fucking fire and burn everything down! Angst Angst Angst!
From February 26, 2005
Untitled Poem
Hello old friend
It's been too long
Do you still remember me?
All the secrets we've shared.
All the lessons we've learned
Please tell me you remember.
Never have I forgotten
And never will I.
Do you still think about me?
Do you?
About all the times
About all the memories
How time seems to take us
In an unwanted direction
Seeping through our aged fingers like grains of sand
But oh how that sand stings our soul
Yet we do not cry
So goodbye old friend, goodbye
Merry meet
Merry we part
Until we merry meet again.
Well...that's interesting...(Not really). I don't remember much of what was going on in my life; I want to say I was probably in 8th grade which means I was living in Eau Claire. I'd say this is around the time that I started reading the book series "Circle of Three" and started getting into Witchcraft and Paganism; this is evident by the last three lines which are typical verses from a lot of Spell Work. No idea who I was writing about, but safe to say we probably are no longer friends and no longer in each other lives because that was well over a decade ago (Jesus Christ) and I no longer live in Eau Claire. Whoever I did write about though, I hope they are living their best life and doing well.
Let's reflect on another poem.
This simple kind of madness
It drives to the bone.
My ears bleed crimson
My soul is torn in two
Mine eyes see horror
My lips quiver in pain
This simple kind of madness
That truely drives the weak insane!
This poem isn't dated, but it's right next to the above poem so I'm assuming it was also written on the same day. When I was a young teen I was a Goth kid who loved Hot Topic and thought Spencers Gifts was the absolute shit. I would take the city bus and go to Oakwood Mall wearing Tripp Pants and fishnets, listening to Linkin Park and System of a Down thinking that I was just SO FUCKING COOL...and I was. I did not give a flying fuck about what others thought of me or my style, and part of me misses that fearlessness of my younger self.
I would like to point out that as I'm writing this blog entry on my lunch break at work, I'm listening to my Avenged Sevenfold Pandora station and I feel like I am sucked back into my very angsty teenage life.
Going forward if I'm unable to find a journal entry for the day that I plan to blog I will go back the journal of poetry and music that I wrote and reflect on that shitacular spectacle. One of these days when I have more time I'll do a journal walk-through in where I'll either take photos or videos of what I physically did with my journals because they still look as bad ass as when I first made them.
My hour is about over and so ends this post. I hope if you're reading this you've found some time to relax this Memorial Day weekend and did something enjoyable...like reading this blog! Thanks for being awesome.
Until next time,
J
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